you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
