her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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