we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
