O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
