Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
