I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Randomize
