Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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