Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Randomize
