I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
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