Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize
