He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Randomize
