yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
