I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize