This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Drunk walkin through police station. America
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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