Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
