I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Randomize
