why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
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