Come see our sink grown plant.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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