There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
