"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
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