haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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