the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Randomize
