Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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