I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
How's work?
Spinning.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
