His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
