i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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