porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
