Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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