went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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