You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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