i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
