i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
So I just went to clothing optional bar
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
