I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
