just tell him i said nine months
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize