he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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