I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
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