it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
