i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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