So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
There r osticjed everywhere
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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