I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
