508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Randomize