If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
