A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
