So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
This house was built for laser tag.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I am naked and annoyed.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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