I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
