I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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