I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Randomize
