discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
operation harelip BJ is a go
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
