You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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