When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Randomize
