Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
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